Free Geekery presents the DIY Guide to Becoming a Real Cyborg. It all boils down to 10 easy steps:
1. RFID Implants
2. Watch the Future
3. Become One with Your Computer
4. Leap Tall Buildings in a Single Bound
5. Become a Human Transformer
6. Talk to the Wired Hand
7. Become a Vehicle for Change
8. Dress Accordingly
9. Refuse to Live with Your Genes
10. Get a Futuristic Life
Well, I feel that I’ve got 2 and 3 covered (although not in the sense described in the article.) But the one that really intrigues me is number 4 — I don’t think even 10 years of sledge hammer workouts will get me in that good of shape. I’m going to need bionic enhancement. Fortunately, it’s available:
Now that you’ve purchased the watch and the head monitor, you might want to add a little bounce to your walk with Powerizers. If you’re an adult and somewhat athletically inclined, you can lay claim to the ability to jump up to 6 feet in the air and to take running strides up to 9 feet in length. You’ll pay for this ability, however, as a pair of Powerizers currently costs $329.99 plus shipping and handling if you order them online. A physically fit bill collector who owns a pair of these shoes might fall under the “evil” category.